Ugh. Today sucked. A lot. As I said in an earlier post, I have been feeling overwhelmed at work. Today that overwhelming feeling got multiplied by a thousand, and a good amount of frustration was added in. The story is a pretty boring one, typical behavior of any large company. The corporate office made a decision to change some things around to make things better in the long run. Sounds good, right? But in the short run, it will be a HUGE amount of extra work, we’re talking lots of overtime, and very tedious, and most of the work will fall on my shoulders. While the idea of all of the extra work causes me a fair bit of anxiety, that wasn’t what was so frustrating. The thing that really got me was how the decision was communicated to the staff. First of all, rumors about it started flying last week. Then, yesterday there were conflicting stories of what was going to happen, depending on which manager you spoke to. This morning, there was confirmation that the changes were not going to happen, it was business as usual. So I spent my day accordingly – working to prepare things as I normally would. At about 3:00 this afternoon, there was an announcement that the changes were going to take place after all! So I wasted the whole day working on something that was ultimately going in the crapper. I’m sorry, I know I’m rambling, but can you sense my frustration???
Needless to say, I was pretty grumpy. And that got me to thinking. What is it that I am so grumpy about? Is it the changes that are coming? Is it the extra work? Am I trying to control something that I have no control over? Why am I frustrated, and what am I going to do about it? I never shy away from extra work, I’m a hard worker and deadlines don’t usually bother me, I always get the work done. Now, I don’t love change, but I have gotten better about rolling with the punches. It occured to me that I often react to these kinds of situations the same way. I get worked up and anxious thinking about how awful things are going to be. I freak out on the inside, while I act like everything is alright on the outside. I worry, worry, worry in anticipation of whatever the crisis is. Here’s the funny thing…when the real thing comes to pass, it is never as bad as I thought it was going to be. Everything usually works out fine. Hmm. I know this. I even have a tattoo that says “It is what it is” to remind me that there are things that I can’t control, and that I have to accept them. You would think that knowing all of that would keep me from becoming such a nutjob when things happen.
So what am I going to do about it? I’m going to get up tomorrow, go to work, and do my job. And I will do it again and again, and in a few weeks, the worst of it will be behind me and things will go back to normal. I’m going to remind myself that this is not a major crisis, I’ve had those, I should know the difference! The most important thing to remember is that it is what it is. It will work out just the way that it’s supposed to. And it’s a whole lot easier to face it with a smile and a good attitude than the alternative.