Gratitude – July 20

 

help each other

Last night our friends who recently relapsed came over for dinner.  They have a few days of new sobriety under their belts and we thought that it might be nice for them to get out of the house and away from the guilt and shame they were feeling.  We spent several hours talking about alcoholism, recovery, our personal stories, relapse, AA…the list goes on.  It was a wonderful evening, I am so glad that they accepted our offer to come visit with us.  They shared with us what feelings and events lead them back to drinking, and the consequences that resulted.  We shared with them our own tales of relapse and of cleaning up the wreckage.  We talked and laughed, as only we alcoholics do, about things that I know would completely horrify the ‘normies’ out there.  Even after being in recovery for a few years, it still blows me away how quickly people trying to accomplish the same thing – sobriety – can become completely comfortable talking about very intimate things.  We alcoholics bond quickly, I think, because we all share the experience of having lived in the hell that is active alcoholism.  It is not a nice place, even just to visit, and I think that talking about it with others like ourselves helps keep us from going back there.

After our friends left last night, I was thinking a lot about how lucky I was to have spent the evening with them.  I am filled with gratitude that they both opened up to us, shared their feelings and their fears.  I am thankful that I was able to offer my own stories and that helped  put them at ease.  I am also grateful that all of us were able to be completely comfortable being vulnerable with one another.  These days I think that is a beautiful, but rare, thing.

I got a voicemail today from the wife thanking us and saying that it really helped them.  That’s so awesome.  What I don’t know is if they left here knowing how much they helped us.  I’ve written before about keeping it green and remembering my last drunk, but I don’t think that anything helps more than talking to other alcoholics.  That’s why I blog, that’s why I go to meetings, that’s why I have a sponsor and that’s why I sponsor others.  Together with other alcoholics, we can accomplish the very thing that we could never do alone.  For that, I am grateful.

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thankful-what

Gratitude – July 8

My post for yesterday is late, but not because I don’t have a lot to be grateful for.  I had a good day at work and was able to get everything done that I needed to.  And again, I was able to do it in only 9 hours!  That’s definitely one for the gratitude list.

The reason that I didn’t get a chance to write last night is because from the time I got off work until well past 10:00 (which is well past my usual bedtime) I was talking with a friend about going to treatment for addiction.  He’s just admitted to family that he is a heroin addict and he wants help.  Our talk wasn’t successful, he didn’t go to treatment, but the seed is planted and I believe that if he really wants to get clean, he will change his mind.  I feel hopeful because I remember what it was like making the decision to go for treatment.  I waffled on the idea for a long time before I finally went, but once I knew it was an option, it was constantly in my thoughts and eventually those thoughts, and my desperation, led me there.

So for yesterday, I am grateful that I got to put my experience, strength, and hope to use.  I am thankful that I wasn’t married to the outcome of the situation, that I was able to accept my friend’s decision, even though I disagreed with it, and that I am still able to be hopeful.

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what are you grateful for today

Gratitude – July 7

first day

I went back to work today and by about 10:00 a.m. it felt like I hadn’t even had a vacation.  Except that it didn’t.  I was well-rested and focused and I was able to get through 47 voicemails and 154 emails.  The work was all the same, but I felt better about it because I took time off to relax.  It’s all about self-care, people!

My work-realted gratitude is:

  • I came back to friends that were happy to see me and that had missed me while I was gone.
  • Everyone said that I looked great and that I must’ve gotten some rest…of course, that makes me wonder what I looked like before…??
  • Several coworkers helped with the day-to-day stuff that I do while I was gone, so the workload wasn’t nearly what I thought it would be on the day returning from vacation
  • My BFF, who keeps a whole closet full of lotions, soaps, body sprays and make-up from Victoria’s Secret and Bath & Body Works brought me a whole bunch of good smelling stuff to welcome me back.
  • I ended up only working 9 hours instead of the 10 or 11 that I thought I would have to.

 

In other news, I had the opportunity to practice the 12th step twice today.  An old friend of mine is trying to quit drinking and she contacted me for advice and help.  Another friend of mine found out today that a close family member is an addict and she turned to me and my husband for help.  If everything goes well, I think that both people will end up in treatment very soon.  One of them, I hope, is on his way right now.  This is the type of thing that I feel truly blesses me.  When I was actively drinking, I never would have been the person that anyone turned to for help.  To be trusted and well thought of is something that I never thought would happen to me.  It is truly a gift of sobriety, and I couldn’t be more grateful.  🙂

Hawaiian rainbow stretching over palm trees.

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Please share your gratitude today.

Please share your gratitude today.