Gratitude – July 29

12 Steps

I tried to post this earlier…really, I did.  No internet connection at home.  Ugh.  What did people do before wi-fi?

Anyway, today I want to express my gratitude for my sobriety and everything that helps me stay sober.  I believe, with all of my heart, that if I hadn’t gotten sober, I would’ve died, either at my own hand, or through crazy, risky behavior like driving in a black out.  I also believe that if I ever pick up again, I will be right back where I was before I stopped some 20 months ago – on the suicide-by-installment plan.   Instead, today, I am able to live my life alcohol-free, mostly drama-free, and with a lot of joy and serenity.

I am grateful for my life of recovery every day, but what brought this to mind specifically was a conversation I had with a friend that I think is on the slippery slope of untreated alcoholism.  I see in her the mood swings that I used to feel myself.  I see the depression that is sometimes obvious, but sometimes just visible under the surface, even though she puts on the facade that everything is okay.  I see and hear the hurt that she feels when she tries to make jokes about her behavior when she’s drinking.  And I see her discomfort when she is seriously hung over, but has to keep going.  So far, she hasn’t suffered any major negative consequences due to her drinking, but as we in recovery know, that just hasn’t happened “yet.”

My friend knows my story, knew me when I relapsed, and saw what I went through on the path to recovery.  I know that sharing my experience, strength, and hope, listening when she needs it, and helping her (if she ever wants help getting sober) is all that I can offer her.  I do hope, though, that she can see that there is a really great, gratitude-filled life on the other side of a life filled with booze.  And I hope she sees it sooner rather than later.

 

So, today I am grateful for….

…sobriety

…Alcoholics Anonymous

…my husband and my sponsor

…good friends who support my recovery

…my fellow bloggers, their blogs, and their comments

…my sponsee, who keeps it fresh for me

…the peace that comes with recovery

…my faith

…the gift of desperation

…my life.

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Please share your gratitude today.

Please share your gratitude today.

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